http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tmrMQJ129pE

Terry Jones has openly admitted that he has never actually read the Quran, and what he learned about Islam, he gathered from YouTube. While he certainly is within his right to harbor such strong feelings against Islam, when other people’s lives could be at stake, he has to think about the ramifications of his actions. He has written an entire book entitled “Islam is of the Devil”, but has only minimal experience with the religion. I believe that Jones and his tiny church of about 50 members are out for attention, and using the storm surrounding their incendiary plans to get funding, and disappear again once they’ve gotten enough. Perhaps Jones is flip-flopping because he realized the intensity of the mess he caused, and that he and many others could be seriously harmed as a result.

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I’m all for freedom of expression but the act of burning any holy book from any religion will only cause tempers to flare and extremists to retaliate. Rather than spending time reflecting on the lives lost in the September 11th attacks, the days leading up to the 9th anniversary of the event has been spent steeped in political controversy. Instead of feeding into the incendiary remarks of those who started this storm, 9/11 would be better used memorializing the lives lost on that fateful day, as well as the men and women that went above and beyond their call of duty in the weeks, months, and years following.

Terry Jones, as well as the congregation of Westboro Baptist Church, (well known for its participation in similarly controversial incidents), and Bob Old, a Tennessean Baptist minister, all have the right to burn whatever they want on Sept. 11. However, this will undoubtedly cause turmoil for all involved, for people here, and especially for the Americans overseas on Muslim soil. Hopefully they realize this and observe September 11th in a way that won’t cause even more lives to be lost over religious extremism.

Though I am in no way a fan of the series, I still chose to watch it. “Why would you subject yourself to such torture, Gabrielle?” you may ask. And honestly, I have no idea. I would compare my choice to seeing a horrible car accident on I-4: you know it’s horrible, but you’re passing by so you might as well look.

Another argument you may choose to follow is “Where is your world-renowned bestseller, Gabrielle?” While I may have no book deal, that does not mean I can’t criticize it, just like you don’t have to be a world class chef to criticize food, and you don’t have to own a car to think one is ugly. With that said, let’s continue into this review.

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In spite of my hatred for the series, I went into the theater with an open mind, willfully forgetting the over 600 pages of fluff and enthralling acts of mediocrity punctuated by insipid whining and brooding the movie was based on. Visually, this movie was far better than its two predecessors, which made it only slightly less painful to endure. The weak plot line remained obscure and stupid, and like the movies before it, and came too little, too late. The stiff acting from the last two movies reared its ugly head, with the main leads continuing to stare doe-eyed and awkwardly at each other. Some characters are pretty much assassinated in this installment, and others finally get a back story.

The basic plot of the movie is actually pretty simple: Edward proposes to Bella, but she is torn between her sparkly, abusive Edward, or not-sparkly, crazy Jacob. There’s that love triangle going on there as the main plot, and underneath, there’s the subplot of Victoria, the ginger vampire from the first book, returning to try and kill Bella for being the cause of her mate’s death. She makes a bunch of new vampires to fight them, they lose, the Volturi step in and do nothing (again), the war is over, Bella accepts the marriage proposal and no one learns anything or grows as a character, or does anything interesting, at all.

High Points

Even in something as horrid as Twilight, the high points, though rare, are there (in very limited supply). I especially enjoyed the back story of Rosalie and Jasper, and I think it was pretty well done, all things considered. However, there is something seriously wrong when the past lives of the accessory characters are more interesting than the current lives of the main characters.

With regards to CGI, Eclipse far outranks its predecessors. Maybe the directors could afford better effects this time around because they didn’t have to pay for wardrobe for the entire Quileute tribe. Again, the sparkling thing the vampires in this series do, improved from last time, but just seemed to remind me of glitter acne. Some bits of CGI seemed choppy or cartoony but overall, it was pretty solid. Actor wise, I liked everybody except the main cast (more on them later), and especially enjoyed was Charlie, Bella’s father, who actually acts like an awkward dad should. Burke is a great actor, but sadly, not enough to balance out the suck of the people with the most screen time.

Low Points

Kristen Stewart as Bella Swan has all the personality of a deflated blow up doll and delivers her lines ineptly and devoid of any emotion or conviction. She stares blankly at everything and only provides minimal action. Like I said before, she has one facial expression, and it serves for every single feeling she can muster. Is she happy? Angry? Distraught? The world may never know.

Robert Pattinson reprised his role as the moody, abusive Edward Cullen, and since the first movie, his accent has improved. Also like the first movies, he looks like he’s had a run of food poisoning and may need to run to the bathroom with explosive diarrhea at any given moment. Taylor Lautner as Jacob is pretty much the only one of the main three that looks like he isn’t in pain, despite the character assassination he undergoes (from caring best friend in New Moon to forcing himself on a taken woman. Ugh.) He had a handful of witty lines which I suppose served to appease the Team Jacob fans (“I’m hotter than you”…really.)

Like always, my biggest beef with this whole thing is the messages it presents. Twilight taught us that you can fall in love so true at the drop of a hat because one person is hot and the other smells good. New Moon taught us that we must all be in a relationship to be whole, and to try and kill ourselves otherwise. Eclipse further cements the fact the author is not only crazy, but really has clueless concerning the content of her books.

In Eclipse, we see Edward rip out the engine to Bella’s truck to keep her away from her best friend, Jacob. I don’t know if I’m the only one who thinks this is a thinly veiled, romanticized case of abuse, but it is. If my significant other was to break into my house to watch me in my sleep without me knowing (as in Twilight), threaten suicide if I was to leave him (New Moon) and destroy my car to prevent me from seeing my friend, I would beat him over the head with whatever blunt object was in reach and get out, fast. But that’s just me. This appeals to people, so maybe I’m the one missing something.

In Eclipse we also learn about imprinting, the process whereby male werewolves find true love or some nonsense, and this shows Meyer is either completely insane, or unbelievably misogynistic. Imprinting is basically a male werewolf falling in love with a female without her even knowing. Once the male werewolf imprints, he’s dedicated for life. If I understand this correctly, that means any person who imprints on a female toddler will, in one single lifetime, be their brother, their best friend, and their lover. All three, maybe even at the same time. It’s conveniently left out that Quil, one of the wolves from the tribe, and I think is 15 or 16 at the time, recently imprinted on a girl named Claire, who, at the time, is two years old.

TWO. Two! What?!

It’s revolting in every sense of the word and should have never left Stephenie Meyer’s crazy brain. Upon the mentioning of this concept, and bringing it to film, I was really hoping Chris Hansen (from To Catch a Predator) or at least, Pedobear, would make an appearance. Sadly, neither did, and I continued to be horrified at the whole thing anyway.

Bias aside, Eclipse was far better than Twilight, and miles ahead of New Moon. I’d give it a three out of ten overall. All that said, I absolutely cannot wait for both installments of Breaking Dawn, and how dreadful that’ll be.

While many people knew that the option of Daddy Dearest Michael Jordan coming in to settle the whole fiasco could possibly come into play, I don’t think many of us expected it to happen. Even though UCF had sought a replacement for Adidas starting last December, I thought the next step would involve something drastic like players having to supply their own gear. I know I didn’t think Nike would come to the rescue, whatever the circumstance. After all, what makes one person so mighty that they can completely change a sponsorship that was in place long before they even enrolled?

What happens when the five year contract is up, and dear old Jordan has graduated or transferred from UCF? More than likely the lucrative free advertisement that the son of the creator of their own Air Jordan brand brings will shrivel and die once he’s no longer a Knight. How will Nike react to losing that? Well, my guess is that we’d be dropped, and Nike would continue with the other (markedly better) Florida universities (UF, FSU, and UM), leaving UCF to get a new deal or grovel at the feet of a brand we were perfectly fine with before.

Now, while style-wise, I must say that Nike is easily a better choice over Adidas, however little that matters, and that new uniforms and equipment for Fall 2010 will be nice to see. But in all fairness, this only shows the power one celebrity (however famous) has over a whole university sports program, all because his offspring threw a fit.

Like I said in October, Jordan Junior could have used the Adidas opportunity to his benefit, and be a team player and show that he could adapt in spite of a personally unfavorable situation. He could make his own image, step out his father’s size 13 shadow. But since fame and fortune seems to overrule, one person’s request has spurned a school-wide fashion change that could turn sour at any moment. There’s no “I” in team, but there’s a “me” in team, and now we know that Marcus Jordan and company prefers that “me” over everybody else.

I’m sure players far better than Jordan have made their mark in UCF history, and they did so in the gear that was provided. Now we know that someone, somewhere, worked some magic with Nike, and we’ll be donning the famous checkmark come August. I’m not saying that no good could come of this, but I’m absolutely positive that none of this would have even crossed anyone’s mind had Jordan not enrolled. All UCF has to do now is get another child of a famous walking advertisement to enroll here, and get them to request yet another brand. Will UCF bend to their will too?

What do you think about this situation? Comment below and let KnightNews.com know.

I was hoping to have this whole thing blow over in due time and get back to real news stories (thanks a lot for getting caught in a slow news cycle, Tiger) and when it seemed like we had all but forgotten about this travesty, he pokes his head out of the woods and makes a multi-network television apology.

I see why it’s such a big deal, but Tiger’s actions come as no surprise. And when a person has gotten as much money as he’s made, it gives the illusion of immortality. Men cheat. Women cheat. Athletes and senators and everybody in between cheat. It is an unfortunate part of life. It’s nothing new to see people in the public eye be unfaithful, but then again, the media frenzy that follows also comes as no surprise.

Admittedly, Orlando seems to attract the more fantastic of these crazy love stories, like astronaut Lisa Nowak back in 2007 who allegedly donned a pack of diapers to skip bathroom stops and drove some 900 miles from Texas to Florida to kidnap the girlfriend of her love interest…(out of this world, right?). Maybe we are so bombarded by this because it’s so close to home, but even then, it’s time to give it up.

I didn’t watch the apology. From what I imagine, it would be scripted and schmaltzy and didn’t have an ounce of truth. Cheetah—I mean, Tiger—isn’t sorry, he’s just sorry he couldn’t keep his multiple partners paid off and hidden in the corner for too long.

Honestly, we’ve seen enough. It’s between him and his wife and no one else. The faster he makes a decision whether he gets back into golfing or not is the faster we can collectively move on and bury the whole thing. He’s apologized, now he should salvage what little good image he has left and move on from there. If I was in his shoes, I’d shut up about it, learn my lesson, and continue golfing better than ever in an effort to regain lost sponsorships.

On the other hand, Tiger deserves an apology too. Those disgusting women of his should at the very least express regret at their actions of courting a married man, and for using him for their own personal gain. Perhaps if they were to look for single men, then they’d find a guy who wanted them for something other than being easy.

And what of Elin? Personally, I think she should divorce him and move on. However, she may just keep the cheater just because it would be hard to part with all his golf-gotten-gains. Either way, she got the raw end of the deal and has the equally attractive choices of a sharp rock and a jagged hard place.

Whether he was sincerely apologetic or not, his apology does not reduce his responsibility to his family and friends. Hopefully the stint in the sex clinic helped his proclivity for skanky big-mouths and will help him return to his position as top golfer so we can all await the next big scandal to hit.

Nap Room. Do you ever find yourself falling asleep in class?? Of course you do. That’s why I want a nap room. Let’s actually use the fourth floor in the Student Union for good! In this room I want Enya playing twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. I want dim lighting. I want Purple Drank (yeah, search it, it’s a drink that makes you sleepy), and I want quiet!

El corral on campus. That’s right, no more will you have to travel over by the UCF hood and the condemned Pub (RIP) to buy this cheap, scrumptious food. You got five bucks? Then you got yourself some chicken, rice, beans, and weird sauce in gross bottles. Eat it between classes or take it to go!

Professor Dunk Tank. I say let’s take the 30 worst rated professors on Rate My Professor and force them in a dunk tank! I know there are some students that absolutely despise their professors. It’s right there under the professor’s comments. I’m talkin’ to those of you who are A and B students, and unfortunately get a D or F due to your worst enemy’s poor organization or strict attendance policy. Well here’s your chance to get ‘em back. The dunk tank will be in the middle of the Student Union with your least favorite professor in it, and you get a chance to completely embarrass them!! Who’s with me??

Free UCF ish. We all know T-shirts are boring. If you give me your vote, this homecoming you can expect free UCF items, such as, themed socks, sweatbands, boxers, sandals, Knightro bobble heads, Coach O’Leary bobble heads, themed connies, towels, bumper stickers, key chains, pencils, beltbuckles, thongs (girls and guys), shot glasses, and onsies. All for free!!

3-D online lectures. They’re boring enough! Why not spice them up with some 3-D, Avatar style??

Pool Party at Hitt’s House. Did you earn a 4.0 and make the President’s honor roll? Probably not, but if you did then you get to attend a pool party at none other than President Hitt’s house! No splashing!

On top of all that, I’ll take a page out of Obama’s book and say I’m closing Guantanamo Conduct, aka Student Conduct, and then never do it!

This year the two candidates are all about the students. Students this, students that. Well I say screw that, I’m all about myself! I have the best ideas and the students know nothing!! If I win it’ll my resume booster, my awesome parking pass, and my sweet pay check. The difference is ME!

2009 was a big year for new music (and I use that term lightly) with catchy new hits seeming to come out every other week. However, radio stations don’t know the meaning of “moderation” and feel the need to play the same song over and over again so often until you can vomit the lyrics on command. The worst offenders are, and in no particular order:

Worst/Most Overplayed:

Boom Boom Pow: The Black Eyed Peas

I really enjoy the BEP, probably more than any other mainstream artiste out there. But I really thought that this song was kind of…boring. I’m all for the onomatopoeia but when sounds outnumber actual words in the song, that’s going a little overboard. I mean, if you took away the background beats and read the lyrics by themselves, for most of the song, it would sound like you had a speech impediment.

You Belong With Me: Taylor Swift

Oh good grief. I hear this song at least once in my commutes to and from school. I’m sorry, Miss Swift, and I’m really happy for you, but…your songs are really overplayed. It’s not just this one, either, that other song about Juliet or something is constantly on as well, but I usually change it to another station, where the same song is being played on yet another station. It’s inescapable.

Single Ladies: Beyonce

Now I couldn’t put Taylor Swift without mentioning Beyonce, since that’s the new relationship thanks to the travesty that was the 2009 VMAs. Don’t get me wrong, I quite enjoyed Single Ladies when it first came out. The lyrics were mediocre but goodness, it was catchy. Then the parodies and the parodies’ parodies came out and the whole thing just was blown out of proportion to the point where you couldn’t drive a centimeter without hearing some mention of it.

Blame It: Jamie Foxx

I blame the success of this horrible song on alcohol (someone must have been drunk to come up with this), among other factors, chief among them being severe, copious and unrelenting use of Auto-Tune. This song was not only overplayed, but it was horrible. While T-Pain has made a name for himself relying heavily on computer generated/assisted music, Jamie Foxx seemed like he could pull off a song without Auto-Tune. Regardless, the fact that this song was blasted so frequently earns it a spot on this list.

Don’t Trust Me: 3Oh!3

I don’t know how they pull it off, but 3Oh!3 turns their voices from grown man to 10 year old girl and back to normal, in a matter of seconds, just for the chorus. Ignoring that, the lyrics are trivial, (I like the vegetarian/”got beef” line though) and bring up Helen Keller out of nowhere.

Obsessed: Mariah Carey

I’m pretty sure everyone except your husband is far from obsessed with you Mrs. Cannon, and honestly, I think you’re a bit crazy, but that has nothing to do with the music you spew. The only obsessive thing about you is how obsessed radio stations are with playing your music, all the time.

Party in the USA: Miley Cyrus

Out of all the songs on the list thus far, this annoys me most, and this one is ranked with one of the songs played most often. Miley’s voice is grating and probably has the capacity to strip decade-old wallpaper with a single note. Even beyond that, in an interview a while back, when asked what Jay-Z song the horrendous song was referring to, she said she didn’t even like Jay-Z. Of course there’s no problem with that, but come on, you may not have written the song, but at least change it to something else you actually listen to…

I Gotta Feeling: The Black Eyed Peas

The only feeling I got from this song is that I’ll have a song I don’t even like stuck in my head from excessive overexposure. That and nausea.

Everything released by Lady Gaga in the past year

Lady Gaga has become a musical superpower in little over a year, with catchy tunes and completely insane outfits whenever she’s seen in public. But even with the title of being the current pop queen of music, there is such a thing as overkill, and radio stations do that well to every single song of hers.

Fireflies: Owl City

Not only is this the most overplayed song of 2009, but it’s just…awful. Adam Young relies so heavily on auto-tuning that (for this song, anyway) he sounds like he could do a speaking part for an 8-bit video game from the 1980s. Ignoring the horrible vocals, the lyrics sound like something a lovesick sixth grader threw up while Googling pictures of puppies. Due to the computer generated sound and the horribly wimpy, sappy, lyrics, Owl City is my estimation of the worst song of 2009. And honestly, I’d rather be electrocuted by the fireflies the song raves about than hear this song again.

That rounds out the most overplayed songs of 2009. But, what are the best? Tune in next Monday to find out.

This is NOT right.

Even normally weather-hardy garden plants took a turn for the worst when left uncovered, in spite of numerous warnings to do so by local news stations.

Poor, dead, hibiscus.

The power demand has reached record levels, and several local schools are without heat until further notice, spurring warm clothes drives until the supply is restored. There was some power loss from almost 8,000 Progress Energy customers this Thursday, but has since been restored. Kissimmee homeowners didn’t lose power.

The worst problem isn’t waiting an extra fifteen minutes for the car to warm up before the usual commute. Billions of dollars stand to be lost in Florida’s strawberry, tomato, citrus and other crops if the freeze doesn’t thaw soon. While these crops are able to withstand cold temperatures, they can only tolerate it for small periods of time, and this episode of cold weather has lasted far longer than these fruits’ threshold. If the freeze doesn’t let up soon, hikes in prices are likely to follow. According to agriculturists, we aren’t at that point yet, but it might, and soon.

Snowbirds from up north have complained of the weather, having to buy warmer clothes and hold off on the expected beach plans. One woman said she could have stayed home (in Ohio) if she wanted to put up with the cold she and her family tried to escape, going as far to say the only thing missing was the snow.

Some relish the drop in temperature and use it as an opportunity to finally break out the winter wear, while others sulk inside with the heat turned way up. The cold spells are not quite over yet either, as Central Florida meteorologists are weighing the probability of sleet (snow’s dirty cousin) and graupel (a knockoff of hail, or a term coined by tricky meteorologists to pull the snow over our eyes, who knows) this weekend. The weather this Saturday and Sunday also determines how well Florida’s crops do: if it stays cold, supply goes down and demand and price goes up, and the rest is Econ history.

Tips to Stay Warm

Invest in a heavy jacket to keep warm, and dress in easily removable layers for when the temperature inevitably rises. Bring your pets indoors on cold nights, and encourage your neighbors to do the same. If you have plants you care about, cover then with an old sheet or blanket, NOT plastic, since plastic will just conduct the cold. Get a squeegee and leave it in your car so you don’t have to use a credit card or driver’s license to scrape away the overnight frost. Don’t pour hot water on a windshield either, chances are, it’ll crack, especially on older or already cracked glass.

In any case, savor this weather while it lasts, or if you’re not enjoying it, use the opportunity to drink half your weight in hot chocolate.

2009 was a huge year for celebrity deaths, the most popular ones probably being Michael Jackson, who is still being aired on television even now, and Farrah Fawcett, one of Charlie’s original Angels, passing away on the same day, and Billy Mays, the ad-man who spoke in caps lock, tossing in one for free a mere three days later (too soon?). Other celebrities lost this year are:

Close to Home

Frances Hillard Millican passed away on December 28 following a fall in her home. Her husband, Charles Millican, the first president of UCF, is still in the hospital recovering. Flags at UCF were raised at half staff two days after her passing to honor her memory and her vast contributions to UCF’s rich history. Paula Hawkins was the first woman to be elected to the Senate without a family connection, and is the only Floridian female Senate to date. Two members of the Disney family also died this year, Roy Disney, a nephew of the famous Walt Disney and Wayne Allwine, the original voice of Mickey Mouse.

Politicians

Several leaders in the realm of politics was lost this year, such as Corazon Aquino, the 11th president of the Philippines and the first female to hold the position, Ted Kennedy, the second most senior Senator in the US Senate, Eunice Kennedy Shriver, a pioneer in serving people with disabilities and the founder of the Special Olympics, Kim Dae-Jung, one of the presidents of South Korea and a Nobel Peace Prize recipient in 2000, Roh Moo-hyun, another president of South Korea, who committed suicide in May.

Pop Culture

Oral Roberts, a famous televangelist, died this month at 91. Patrick Swayze, most known for his role in Dirty Dancing lost his battle to pancreatic cancer, Natasha Richardson suffered a head injury, Brittany Murphy suffered cardiac arrest earlier this month, Ed McMahon, who spent thirty years on The Tonight Show, David Carradine, most famous for his role in Kill Bill, Bea Arthur, the tall, deep-voiced comedienne and one of The Golden Girls, and Ricardo Montalban, whose career spanned over seventy years.

Sports

22 year old Nick Adenhart died in a car accident in April following one of his most successful baseball games. Vernon Forrest, a professional boxer, was murdered at a gas station in Georgia. Steve McNair, a quarterback for the Tennessee Titans, was also murdered this year, by his mistress, Sahel Kazemi, in what was determined to be a murder-suicide. Karine Ruby was a snowboarder and Olympic gold medalist who died following a climbing accident.

Other famous faces lost this year were the Taco Bell Dog, Gidget, who lived for 15 years, Millvina Dean, who was the youngest passenger on the Titanic, at 9 weeks old, was the last remaining survivor of the unsinkable ship. 89 year old Mickey Carroll died this year, and was one of the last remaining Munchkins from the original Wizard of Oz.

Many others were lost this year not listed in this article, but that does not mean they are not missed by friends, family and loved ones. May all those lost this year rest in peace, but live on in our hearts.

Events

2009 is the last year of the first decade of the new millennium, and was filled with monumental international events, such as:

January:

On January 20th, Barack Obama was inaugurated as the 44th President of the United States, following his win of the presidency on November 4th, 2008.

February:

The worst fires in Australian history began on February 7th, killing and injuring hundreds, and leaving thousands homeless in its wake.

March:

On March 2nd, the president of Guinea-Bissau was assassinated in an attack on his home.
April:

The Swine Flu begins in Mexico and spreads panic worldwide. The fifth Summit of the Americas was held in Trinidad on April 17th.

May:

On May 25th North Korea announced that they had conducted a successful nuclear test, instantly condemned by the United Nations.

June:

The first day of June was when Air France Flight 447 en route from Brazil crashed into the Atlantic Ocean, killing everyone on board. On June 11th, the Swine Flu got the designation of “pandemic” and further heightened the already growing panic.

July:

On July 7th, Michael Jackson’s public memorial service was held and it was probably the biggest funeral of all time. Also in July was the longest solar eclipse of the 21st century, lasting almost six and a half minutes.

August:

Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi, jailed for the 1988 bombing of Pan Am Flight 103 was released on August 20th on compassionate grounds to his native Libya due to his terminal illness of aggressive prostate cancer.

September:

On September 29th and 30th, 2 earthquakes hit Samoa and Indonesia, killing almost 1200 people total.
October:

Rio de Janeiro received the okay to host the 2016 Olympics on October 2nd, beating out Obama’s hometown of Chicago, despite his personal efforts.
November:

Water was found on the moon on November 13th following purposefully crashing a rocket into the moon.
December:

We bid farewell to the first ten years if the first decade of the new millennium. Happy New Year folks!